Ryan Lee, at The Washington Blade, has an interesting article on a heated debate, at least in recent times:

Is the “f-word” the new “n-word”?

But faggot and the most reviled racist slur in the English language share a legacy of hatred, and appear to be headed toward a similar fate, said Harvard Law School professor Randall Kennedy, author of “Nigger: The Strange Career of a Troublesome Word.”

“Each of these words has been used to humiliate people and sometimes terrorize people,” Kennedy said. “When they’re used in that way the people who use them should be ostracized.

“For most people who value their reputation, they’re going to be very careful around these words, and in my view, that is unequivocally a good thing,” said Kennedy, who added that it is a mistake to try to eradicate them entirely.

Not everyone wants to see the words continue to be a part of our country’s vocabulary.

“I think it should be retired,” said gay comedian Jason Stuart, who in seventh grade had someone scratch the word faggot into his locker door.

“It told me to shut up, it taught me not to stand up for myself, it let me know something was wrong with me and I was bad,” said Stuart, who refuses to use the word in his acts or private conversations.

Later in the article Neil Guiliano of the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation says that he would discourage use of the “f-word” in “friendly circles”:

“There may be some who find it acceptable gay-man-to-gay-man, but I would discourage that use,” he said. “We need to be more sensitive to the casual use of what is a very derogatory word.”

The debate is bigger than just the “f-word” though. Many people within the LGBT community use the word “queer” to identify themselves, while for many other people the word remains a horrible slur. The same goes for the word “dyke.”
Where do we draw the line betwee using slurs as self-identifiers and while joking amongst gay friends. Is it ethical to say “We can use these words, but you cannot” to straight people?

Words of hate are words of hate. Or… do their meanings and symbolism change with the intent of their use? If so, how does one always know a person’s intent in using the words? (hint: you can’t always know someone’s intent).

The debate is ethical and philosophical and, as always, many opinions exist. I doubt the debate will end any time soon.

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